My daughter told my wife some things about what my ex wife said. And how kniving that woman is pisses me off to no end. My ex told ash that she can come longer cause next summer she will never come back again cause she will want to hang out with her friends in jersey. She told my wife that in confidence and asked her. Not to tell me cause she knows I'd want to go all American psycho on my ex. This is just a fraction of what is goin on wit my ex. Not only is she tellin her stuff but my ex mother in law and sister in law is fillin her head with crap. Ash does have a good head on her shoulders and knows that I love her and do all I can for her. And that my wife loves her and her sisters and brother. The more I think about it makes me want to drive up to jersey and beat some sense in that woman. But I know it will get me no where. I have prayed for her and that is the hardest prayer I have ever prayed. I know God says to love your enemies. Any advise on what to do


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Hard to say, I dont have kids, hell still a kid myself but similar case with my ol man. It sucks because shes so far away. You cant do much as far as her wanting to be with her friends. Maybe do something to make her want to stay down there. Dont bad mouth the mother because that shit will go straight to her head. Shitty situation man

Yeah I never say nothin bad about her mama in front of her cause I don't want ther to hate me for that. She does talk to my wife and confide in her a lot of things that she won't tell me. This sucks


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I went through the same shit with my children. My advise: Be the better person and prove the "said" truth is bs. Kids are not stupid and pickup on the phonies. Make the lies come out as lies and indirectly point them out (if that makes any since). I have a bond with my kids now that is stronger than they have with their mother. Most importantly to me is let them know they are appreciated and their presence in your home is appreciated. AS HARD AS IT IS, DO NOT DIS THE MOM IN FRONT OF THE CHILD. I know that's a hard one ,but that will build a disrespect on your part. I'm speaking from a person that went through a nasty divorce. Hope this helps and I know I spoke as "they", but I was speaking for myself and what worked for my boys. My ex doesn't have shit on the bond I have with my kids. Good luck bro.

I know you have a lot longer of a distance ,but If I get my boys and go to the camp and back its 6 hours of driving in 36 hours. It sucks.

That^ the way my ol man did it was no matter how much shit was said from her mouth he woukd always eat it and show he was the bigger person. Even though it went against everytging he beleived in. He would promote spending equal time with her and in the end he won the custody, the long and the short of it. Dont stoop down to her level, let your daughters bond with you and your current wife grow, and it will over time. Just have to have the upper hand

003.JPGI have to say your post hit me hard in history. I quit dating and dedicated every minute to my boys and won the upper hand. It was a big dedication, but fu** their mom. My boys

Record the conversations with your daughter just in case you have to prove what she told you.

U should find out what your daughters interest are (if you aren't sure) and do them to the fullest while she's with ya. Just trying to help

I hate to hear this man. Like said above, Be urself around ur daughter she will remember that. I'm sure her mom is a drama queen and she more than likely appreciates u not being. Don't react to the ex in any negative way. U have to be the better person and let things be unless she steps on ur rights to see ur daughter. If that happens u have to get a lawyer involved. There's nothing u can do personally to get anywhere with the ex, not even treating ur little girl like a princess. Only thing left is be patient, keep praying and things will be as good as they can be. Wish u the best man, very tough place to be in.

Thanks guys. I don't under stand my ex. My daughters best friend has been callin and talkin to my ex and then textin my daughter sayin she misses her and that she is tryin to piss her off (my daughter) so she will come back and not spend time with us Texas people. And she is 11. I would never confide in one of my child's friends. I am an adult. It blows my mind. I just told Ash that friends come and go but your sisters and brother will always be here. They are your blood. Well except for my step son but I say he is mine and have always told ash that that is he brother. I have a lot of documents from emails and texts that I have printed and saved for her to read when she gets older and asks why. For now I just say do what God would want you to do and what is right. And that I love her and so does every one else.


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Correct me if I'm wrong, but can't the child decide what parent they want to live with at age 12?

I really hate this for you, bud. Can't be very many things worse than a spiteful ex trying to hurt you by hurting your children. From the sounds of it, at least she understands what her mom is trying to do, & she's not falling for it. Keep doin what you're doin, & be the better parent. She'll see how much you love her & how wrong her mom is. Then, when the time comes, she'll pick you over the ex.

Good luck, man. Praying for yall.

it sucks to here your going thru that me and my wife are going thru the same thing now with a dead beat dad that the court believe can change he fills my step daughters head up with nothing but bs and as much as I would love the hold him under water until the bubbles stop but I cant and I know if we bad mouth him they will win cause then we look like bad people so my approached is have fun and be yourself we go fishing and hunting and she would rather be with us even thou my rules are more stricter than his no rules approach

Keep in mind that it is her mother and to beat on her fiscally or verbally will only make u feel good for a short while and do your daughter harm. Your Daughter will always come back to you as you are her dad. Just keep on loving her! Sounds like you put it God's hands so now its faith you'll need to muster and all will work out fine. Nothing ever works out on my time line but it does Gods!

Yeah i am strict on her but she really don't give me problems. The only thing is she likes to go go go and we just kick back and chill. Her mom buys her anything she wants at the drop of a hat. Her husband told her (my ex) that Ash has way too much crap and I agree with him. She is tryin to buy her love it seems to me. But my little girl has a good head on her sholders and knows bs when she sees it and will call you on it. Quess it is the half coonass in er.

Dont feel bad aka when i discipline my daughter i feel like a drill sargeant but she eventually gets over it then were solid again but gator22 da go get'ers signature says it best when you have to deal with people like that you cant argue with stupidity theyll just bring you down to their level and beat you with experience just do what you do if shes as smart as you say you want have anything to worry about