1.) Because I don't like the idea that we came from apes… despite that humans are categorically defined and classified as apes.

2.) Because I'm too stupid and/or lazy to open a fucking science book or turn on the Discovery Science Channel.

3.) Because if I can't immediately understand how something works, then it must be bullshit.

4.) Because I don't care that literally 99.9% of all biologists accept evolution as the unifying theory of biology.

5.) Because I prefer the idea that a (insert god of choice) went ALLA-KADABRA-ZAM MOTHAH-FUCKAHS!!!

6.) Because I can't get it through my thick logic-proof skull that evolution refers ONLY to the diversity of living organisms which reproduce with genetic variation, not to abiogenesis, or planet formation, or big bang cosmology, or whether God exists, or where they buried Jimmy Hoffa, or why the sky is blue, or how many licks it takes to get to the center of a fucking Tootsie Pop.

7.) Because the fossil record doesn't comprise the remains of every single living thing that ever existed on this 4.5 billion year old planet, even though fossilization is a rare process that only occurs under very specific circumstances.

8.) Because science has yet to produce any transitional species… except for the magnitudinous numbers of them found in the fossil record which don't count because… I uh, OOH LOOK! A SHINY OBJECT!!! *runs away*

9.) Because I know nothing about Darwin except that he had a funny beard.

10.) Because the theory of evolution (which, according to scientists, perfectly explains the richness and diversity of life on Earth) contradicts biblical literalism… ya know, flat Earth with a firmament that keeps out the water, talking snakes, people rising from the dead, bats are birds, flamey talking bushes, virgin births, food appearing out of nowhere, massive bodies of water turning into blood… etc etc.

11.) Because I think the word "theory" actually means: "random stabs in the dark" when it really means: "an explanation of certain phenomena that is well-supported by a large body of facts and often unifies similarly well-supported hypotheses" i.e. atomic theory, gravitational theory, germ theory, cell theory, some-people-are-dumb-motherfuckers-theory, etc.

12.) Because the fact that science is self-correcting annoys me. Most of my other beliefs are rigidly fixed and uncorrectable.

13.) Because I am under the severely mistaken impression that evolution implies someone in my very recent ancestry was a chimp.

14.) Because everything appears designed to my mind which was expertly tuned by nature to perceive design, probably as a survival mechanism.

15.) Because some secretly fabulous closet-dwelling televangelist (who unironically preaches hate towards gays) told me that evolution is Satan's way of leading me away from God.

16.) Because that same guy (who was also caught snorting blow off a male hooker's shiny naked ass) told me that God planted those fossils to test my faith.

17.) Because I'm 100% correct about everything 100% of the time and there is 0% chance that some snooty Oxford educated scientist with numerous honorary doctorates could possibly know something that I don't.

18.) Because I don't know that fossils are found in sedimentary strata corresponding to their age as one would expect if evolution were true.

19.) Because I don't understand why, if we share common ancestry with chimps, there are still chimps. And when someone with more than three brain cells in their head inevitably replies: "for the same reason Americans share common ancestry with Brits but there are still Brits, I can't follow the logic. It's just too big a leap. Who am I, Evil Knievel?

20.) Because my mom dropped me on my head when I was a baby.

21.) Multiple times.

22.) On purpose.

23.) Because the idea that life evolved naturally over billions of years is infinitely less believable than the idea that an 800 year old man crammed two of every species into a giant wooden boat when the entire planet flooded, an event for which there is absolutely no geological evidence whatsoever and also makes no fucking sense at all.

24.) Because Jesus totally rode around on a fucking t-rex. He's just that badassed. And also, did you know that t-rexes were vegetarians? Ken Ham says so and I believe it.

25.) Because I don't realize that saying "microevolution is possible but macroevolution isn't" is as stupid as saying "I can pick my nose for one second but I cannot pick it for 10 seconds."

26.) Because the education system failed me miserably.

27.) …and then took a big wet dump on my face.

28.) Because I think that knowing how nature works magically obliterates all of its beauty.

29.) Because I didn't know that evolution has been tested and observed in laboratories.

30.) Because when confronted with that, I refuse to believe it. It's obviously a scientific conspiracy aimed at turning everyone on the planet into atheists... even though evolution says nothing about god's nature nor whether he, she, it, or they exist.

31.) Because I'm too stupid to realize that Social Darwinism has nothing to do with evolution and is actually a pseudo-scientific bastardization that real science largely rejects.

32.) Because the planet and all the life on it was designed for humans… kinda like how the Metropolitan Museum of Art in NY was designed specifically for the dust-bunnies that may accumulate on the floors.

33.) Because I don't realize that if we actually found croco-ducks in the fossil record, it would call many evolutionary principles into serious question.

34.) Because plenty of respectable people like Ron Paul and Mike Huckabee (who are not scientists) don't accept evolution, and that somehow validates my opinion.

35.) Because my mother didn't know not to drink while she was pregnant. She also didn't know not to repeatedly throw herself down a flight of stairs in an attempt to undo the accident of screwing someone who voted for Bush both times.

36.) Because I don't know that "irreducible complexity" has been debunked a frazillion times by a frazillion different people and is no more credible an argument than "NEEN-er NEEN-er NEEN-er, I'm right and you're wrong."

37.) Because I have never seen a duck evolve into a cat over night, despite the fact that such a thing would be contrary to all known scientific disciplines.

38.) Because I have no imagination, learning is too much effort, I don't like proven facts, change scares me, and I think deoxyribonucleic acid is something I'm supposed to clean my bathroom floors with.

39.) Because evolution means that I absolutely MUST reject everything else I know, abandon all my beliefs, and start aping around my house like a fucking monkey. OOOh-ooohh-ooohohh -OOOOOOHHHHHH!!!!!

40.) Because I haven't put my cave on the market and moved into the 21st century yet. I'm waiting for the cave market to rebound from the recent financial meltdown.

41.) Because I don't know what an atavism is and if you told me, I still wouldn't believe it. Too weird.

42.) Because I don't know that evolution explains methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus and also provides the answer in preventing it from turning into a superbug and killing massive numbers of people.

43.) Because I don't know that evolution is routinely used in medicine to diagnose and treat certain illnesses such as genetic ailments, bacterial infections, and viral infections.

44.) Because I believe there is a strong comparison between designed inanimate objects such as buildings, paintings, and watches (which we know were pieced together from identifiable components by human beings) and living organisms (which reproduce with genetic variation under the effects of environmental attrition).

45.) Because I see no significant similarities between humans and apes. *scratches my ass-crack then smells my fingers*

46.) Because I think I'm too special to have been crafted by any natural process. In fact, I'm so fuckin special, the entire planet, solar system, galaxy, and universe were created with me especially in mind, yes, I am THAT hotdamn important.

47.) Because I unquestioningly swallow the ignorant anti-science bullshit spewed directly from the fraudulent stupid asses of people like Ken Ham, Ted Haggard, Fred Phelps, and Kent Hovind.

48.) Because I'm a freethinker and freethinking really means ignoring anything that contradicts what I already believe.

49.) Because I don't know what confirmation bias is.

50.) Because "GOD DID IT" is the answer to anything I don't immediately comprehend and I certainly don't understand evolution.

Cliff notes please...

Damn, you must have gone to Harvard. Your list clarifies the obvious foolishness of creationism. If that chapter in that book put together by those writers and edited by those other men had only mentioned that no one knew how long it took to creat the world and mankind, we would all be so much happier and get along so much better. They weren't just happy with making it a best seller. No, they had to add a little fiction so it would become even more popular.

What about intelligent design?

so, all our species evolved from single cell organisms from random mutations? Have you looked into the science of that? The math done to compute how long it would take a species to evolve is incredible......I was a total evolutionist untill i saw that....now I have consigned myself to intelligent design.....there is no way scientifically evolution could occur in the time the earth has been here to give us the numbers of species we have and had..... It would take billions of years just for a worm to evolve from a single cell through random mutations. Remember, random mutations are not always good for the species, sometimes sending them to extinction.

The human Y-chromosome has been a sore point among secular scientists in recent years because of its many anti-evolutionary surprises. Adding to the Darwinian grief, is yet one more shocking Y-chromosome study that more clearly illustrates the boundaries of human genetic diversity.

Much controversy has brewed during the past few years over the genomic sequences of what have been termed "archaic" humans. This so-called "ancient DNA" was extracted from bone fragments of "Neandertal" and "Denisovan" specimens and then sequenced, providing draft blue prints of these respective genomes.1, 2 While much hypothetical speculation has raged over how much interbreeding went on between modern humans and archaic humans, the fact remains that both types were shown to be fully human.

Now, a modern living human has been discovered who has Y-chromosome variation that increases the range of human DNA diversity beyond that of so-called archaic humans.3 This new data unequivocally proves that Neandertals and Denisovans were well within the DNA variability range of modern humans—not extinct primitive evolutionary offshoots of the human lineage.

Earlier DNA studies attempted to prove that archaic humans were different than modern humans, based on slight variations in their mitochondrial DNA—a small circular piece of DNA outside the nucleus in the cell’s mitochondria that is inherited maternally. In fact, because the Y-chromosome undergoes very little DNA change, and is considerably larger in size than the mitochondrial genome, it is a much more reliable measure of human DNA diversity.

Not surprisingly, this new discovery confirms the conclusions and predictions first proposed by researchers when the entire Neandertal genome draft sequence was published in 2010.1 In this report, the authors state, "Neandertals are expected to be more closely related to some present-day humans than they are to each other." The new Y-chromosome study now fully confirms this hypothesis made by evolutionists themselves.

Another Y-chromosome study of great importance in the human-origins debate is the recent report of extreme differences between the human and chimpanzee MSY (male determining) regions. The MSY region contains most of the genes in the Y-chromosome. In this report, approximately 50% of the DNA sequence did not even match between chimps and humans. Humans also had twice as many genes as chimps in the MSY region. In fact, the evolutionary authors of the study shockingly note that given "6 million years of separation, the difference in MSY gene content in chimpanzee and human is more comparable to the difference in autosomal gene content in chicken and human, at 310 million years of separation."4

Confirming this stunning human-chimp Y-chromosome data is another recent research report in which the analysis of all chimpanzee chromosomes showed only a 70% DNA similarity on average to human.5

These scientific discoveries related to human origins, as revealed by modern DNA sequencing technologies, can be summarized by the following key points.

•Modern humans, Neandertals, and Denisovans are all part of the same human "created kind."
•Chimpanzees are simply a type of ape, created distinctly and uniquely as their own "kind."
These findings fully confirm the Bible which states in the book of Genesis that all living things were created with distinct genetic boundaries "after their kind." The Bible also clearly tells us that, concerning mankind’s genetics, God "hath made of one blood all nations of men for to dwell on all the face of the earth" (Acts 17:26).

Science us open to the interpretation of the person conducting the experiments their findings can easily be manipulated to support the findings they are trying to prove or disprove. Like the man made global warming that was supported by science to make al gore millions

He left out the 2nd law of thermodynamics.

I don't really see any facts in your 50 reasons, despite that you seem to think of yourself as a scientiist. just looks like 50 of your most redundant opinions, and you know what they say about those...

domestication of wolves and the human breeding of those domesticated wolves gave us dogs....man created evolution......dog breeds did not arise on their own. I do not consider that evolution because it was not a natural occurence... The reason I am in the intelligent design camp is because of the math......random mutations can not give us the diversity we have nor can it explain the cambrionic explosion of new species in a relatively short time frame....There is also a distint seperation of adaptation and evolution.....adaptation is a birds beak adapting to an environment where all the seeds fall in the cracks of rocks and the bird adapts and begins growing a crooked beak to reach those seeds.....that is not evolution, its adaptation. Just like the color of foxes on different islands may differ. adaptation.....evolution is much bigger..it is a species evolving into another species...like a modern chicken evolving into a new species like say an armadillo....or modern man evolving or devolving into something new.....


think of random mutations....random.....not all if any mutations make the species better to cope with its surrounding and then it has to become the dominate breeder to pass those mutations on and they have to be able to accept this new mutation to produce viable offspring. Where do new species come from? Are they totally evolved fresh from singke cell organisms. What are the catalysts for those mutations? When will evolutionists be able to show the transformation from one species to the next? They have shown the pictures of ape to man....but they cannot connect those species, where are all the missing links? I believe in a creator. Something has created our universe. It has laws that have been in effect since the birth of the universe and the complexity of living things and the process in which their bodys and organs function can in no way have been brought about by random mutations. do the math.

oh, and everybody around the world has nig genes in them....so that makes you an eggplant.

for anyone interested in a book that will make you think about evolution and intelligent design. it is "the edge of evolution" "the search for the limits of darwinism" by Micheal J Behe.

another good book about darwin is " evolutions captain" by peter nichols. It details the account of how darwin ended up aboard the beagle, the boat that led him to tierra del fuego and on to the galapogos.